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  • Saints 10-0, but somehow still suck

    NEW ORLEANS — According to NFL analysts, the New Orleans Saints, one of two 10-0 teams in the NFL, don’t have what it takes to be 10-0.
    Off to their best start in franchise history, the Saints have found themselves in the hunt for the one thing which has always [...]
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    Posted: November 25, 2009, 3:15am EST

  • A potentially controversial post

    Let’s face it. Much of the vocal opposition to President Barack Obama is racist in nature.
    Contrary to what some critics might suggest, this isn't an easy allegation for me to make. I'm not a believer in the notion that every injustice against a minority is necessarily a race issue. [...]
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    Posted: November 24, 2009, 2:54am EST

  • Flag football recap, 11/15

    Here are the notes I have for the Nov. 15 SOFA game:
    “50-40 half91-90 final (FG)”
    The rest of the notebook is waterlogged, because it was a wet one. Hoo boy.
    I aired out the flags for several days after. On Friday night, I put them in my car. An [...]
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    Posted: November 21, 2009, 1:34pm EST

  • I hate when I'm right

    Recently I was invited - evidently through Facebook's ironic algorithms - to join the group "Nationwide Tax Day Tea Party." It's got 56,088 members, 27 videos and 2,060 photos.
    The photo album is a particular source of enlightenment. For one thing, you don't see a single protest picture' [...]
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    Posted: November 21, 2009, 12:53pm EST

  • Confidential to the millionaire heir I talked to yesterday

    Don't insist my politics are based on jealousy over how much money you make.
    "Make." Huh. That's a joke! You say you work, and I'm sure you do, but let's face it - you inherited a fortune. All this talk about just providing for your family - and your sneering [...]
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    Posted: November 20, 2009, 9:24am EST

  • Not to belabor the point...

    Peyton Manning is officially in Tom Brady territory with me.
    I can see why people like Peyton, both on and off the field. I do too. I even initially thought after the Colts' comeback win over the Patriots on Sunday night that the Colts might just be the best team' [...]
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    Posted: November 17, 2009, 12:29pm EST

  • Flag football recap backlog

    These are for the players who cannot read them through the social networking sites, where I tend to post them on Fridays or Saturdays. Starting with the newest one, I will start posting them here when freshly written. Enjoy.
    • 11/8: The nail-biters continued this week at SOFA as, for [...]
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    Posted: November 17, 2009, 12:09pm EST

  • When bottom lines clash with yard lines

    OK, so the NFL fined Chad Ochocinco $20,000 for jokingly offering an official $1 to overturn a decision. It was an obvious joke by a guy so committed to keeping it light-hearted that he legally changed his last name to his uniform number. If the NFL.com message board is any [...]
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    Posted: November 15, 2009, 12:00am EST

  • Tuesday will be my Black Friday

    I went to the mall today. I never go to the mall.
    Stopped by a crowded Borders to get Sports Illustrated. SI picks the Saints to win it all, yet has Peyton Manning on the cover. No respect.
    Guy in front of me in line to cashier: "Is the new" [...]
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    Posted: November 14, 2009, 2:47pm EST

  • Eye for an eye? Not I

    Does anyone else find it ironic that the U.S. government executed a former Army sharpshooter on Veterans Day?
    Maybe it isn't so ironic, especially in light of the recent Fort Hood shootings at the hand of Nidal Malik Hasan. Some say the common thread is Muslim extremism. But I think' [...]
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    Posted: November 12, 2009, 1:17am EST

  • Blending sports and politics...something I've never, ever done before

    (*-I know this is similar to my last entry, but it bears repeating.)
    As some of you perhaps know, I am a bit of a fan of the New Orleans Saints. I was born the year of the 1-15 Aints, so there was never a question that it would be [...]
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    Posted: November 10, 2009, 12:45am EST

  • Rule #148: Wait 'till this year

    Tradition means nothing in modern pro sports. You can't say the Yankees won the World Series this year because they've won 26 times before; they won because they played well in 2009. Or, more importantly, because they could afford to assemble the best team with their obscene payroll.
    This doesn't' [...]
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    Posted: November 05, 2009, 8:12am EST

  • "Plan? There ain't no plan!"

    You probably have something to vote for today. If you do, go.
    Today at the Springfield polls, the major issue is whether or not to approve a 3/4-cent sales tax to help defray a shortfall in the police-fire pension fund. Due to bad investments and the economic meltdown (among other [...]
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    Posted: November 03, 2009, 11:07am EST

  • Rule #147: Grain of Salt

    When discussing health care, wars or any other issue, we must consider the source. In recent years, the idea of what constitutes truth has been skewed, largely by the media, to mean two opposing sides - even if the two sides represent apples and oranges. Or, more likely these days, [...]
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    Posted: November 02, 2009, 10:32am EST

  • Passing thought

    The woman behind one religious-conservative blog I occasionally read is currently on a trip to the Grand Canyon, and raving about it. I can dig it; I myself have been there. It lives up to the hype, in my opinion. I do, however, find it interesting that the very existence [...]
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    Posted: November 01, 2009, 9:06pm EST

  • Now, where was I?

    I have a new laptop and working Internet service at home.
    Back to your regularly scheduled blogging. [...]
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    Posted: October 30, 2009, 12:43pm EDT

  • Points

    • I’ve most likely covered this before, maybe even more than once, but after the recent White House attacks on Fox News (and the multiple mindless, and oddly identical, defenses of the network by conservative bloggers), I think it needs to be said again:
    Either Fox News is a [...]
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    Posted: October 23, 2009, 11:13am EDT

  • It's probably time I wrote a new entry

    Well, I have a new laptop now, rent be damned. A brand-spanking-new Macbook Pro. Now I understand the meaning of paranoia.
    Last night I dreamed that I was at the library and had to leave my belongings for an indeterminate period of time. When I came back, both of [...]
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    Posted: October 22, 2009, 12:40pm EDT

  • Wipe this

    Early Thursday morning, on my drive home from work, I found myself traversing roads soaked from a vortex of rain. The worst of it had stopped, but a consistent drizzle continued.

    I drive a boxy Scion hatchback, which means I have a rear windshield wiper. I probably use mine [...]
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    Posted: October 16, 2009, 12:59am EDT

  • Sigh...

    Rule #142: A Real Card of a Report
    The only thing worth reporting about a report commissioned by the insurance industry that says a public option is a bad idea, is how comically worthless such a thing is. Gee, the private insurance industry opposes the formation of a public insurance [...]
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    Posted: October 15, 2009, 12:42am EDT

  • SOFA recap, 9/27/09

    (Note: By popular participant demand, I post a recap of our flag football game from two weeks ago. I'm late with last week's too, but will post it Saturday. Can't wait to get a computer so I can do this whenever I please!)

    SOFA snapped its extended series of' [...]
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    Posted: October 09, 2009, 10:37pm EDT

  • Obama's Nobel Peace Prize outrages people who hate the Nobel Peace Prize

    Usually, when a Democratic president or politician wins the Nobel Peace Prize, Republicans dismiss it as a meaningless honor from a pretentious foreign body. That is, when they aren't shrieking about how unfair/political/preposterous/horrifying it is that such a prestigious honor went to someone so undeserving/agendariffic/not like them.

    And they' [...]
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    Posted: October 09, 2009, 12:06pm EDT

  • Why the Saints are winning (and how to keep them winning)

    I have a Reggie Bush jersey that I received as a Christmas present in 2006. Here's a picture of me wearing it during a football game:



    The Saints have never won a game on days in which I wore this jersey. Case in' [...]
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    Posted: October 06, 2009, 2:07pm EDT

  • All apologies should be like Grayson's

    Rule #139: Vie quickly
    Alan Grayson should run for president in 2016. Because if President Obama and the Democrats clone his backbone, there'll be no need for Grayson to run in 2012.

    Rule #140: Ya betcha best-seller
    Now that Sarah Palin is set to release her new autobiography, "Going'" [...]
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    Posted: October 02, 2009, 1:25am EDT

  • Parenting tips from Ian

    Today: How to buy cigarettes for your underage daughter

    (Based on actual events)

    * Don't tell the grocery clerk that they're for your daughter. Really. How hard is that?

    * Request beforehand that your daughter not react to the purchase by jumping on your back and squealing, [...]
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    Posted: September 28, 2009, 12:44pm EDT

  • New rules, (almost) all-sports edition

    Rule #136: Best of the weak
    "Plays of the week" sports highlight reels must comprise actual thrilling plays; context should not be necessary. These feats of athleticism should halt me in my tracks when shown without sound in a crowded gym, not require explanation with 25 SportsCenter one-liners. I'd rather' [...]
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    Posted: September 21, 2009, 4:28pm EDT

  • Wanted: A smart conservative

    Here's a conversation I'd like to have:

    Me: "I'd like to see universal health care in the United States. Short of that, I'd like to see a public insurance option offered by the government, as a way of making insurance cheaper and more honest across the board."

    Conservative: [...]
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    Posted: September 19, 2009, 4:04pm EDT

  • The rules are back (But I'm not quite yet)

    Rule #130: One way to cut health care costs
    When health care reform passes - and it will - administrators have a right to deny it to anyone who protested against it. OK, maybe that's too harsh, but it's very, very likely that not all among the thousands upon thousands [...]
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    Posted: September 16, 2009, 12:31am EDT

  • Pretty serious setback

    Yesterday, immediately after the publishing of my previous blog, my laptop folded for the last time. Cause of death: an apparently unbeatable spyware-induced Trojan horse virus, exacerbated by years of declining performance and physical deterioration. Also, my fist.

    Figures. Several months ago, my mom offered me several hundred dollars [...]
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    Posted: September 09, 2009, 12:24am EDT

  • A guide to understanding (anti-education) parents

    The ongoing flap over President Obama’s scheduled speech to the nation’s students has to be the saddest, most desperate action yet. Numerous school districts (including both in my current city and my hometown) will allow parents to opt the children out of the speech, during which they’ll apparently convene in [...]
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    Posted: September 08, 2009, 10:30am EDT

  • A modest proposal: Employers' Day

    If we have Labor Day, shouldn't we also have Employers' Day? After all, big corporations and businesses also make the American economy what it is, and it's only fair to honor them too.

    I'm sick of all this whining by laborers that enough hasn't been done to end centuries' [...]
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    Posted: September 07, 2009, 10:59am EDT

  • Snotty

    I've been almost too sick to function this past week. And by function, I mean work rare daytime hours and entertain my visiting mom. I completely lost my voice for several days and, at one point, I couldn't sleep for more than an hour without leaping straight up to catch [...]
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    Posted: September 05, 2009, 11:51am EDT

  • Up ahead: a shocking notion

    Supposed "grass-roots" pro-coal campaign Web site uses stock photos:


    It seems to me that a movement so driven by the support of good ol' folks with no partisan or corporate agenda wouldn't have to use fake "real people" in their promotional materials. After all, aren't there plenty of' [...]
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    Posted: August 28, 2009, 11:08am EDT

  • Always an adventure of some sort

    Why does the entire northern half of Louisiana both smell and taste like cadaver's poo after a last meal of sulfur quiche?
    (And by taste, I mean you can taste the air. And not on purpose.) [...]
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    Posted: August 24, 2009, 9:30am EDT

  • Train of thought, derailed

    Saw this on some YouTube video likening Obama to Nazi brownshirts:



    Yeah! Obama is Hitler, and we're not gonna stand for this! It's time to TAKE BACK AMERICA!! But we gotta take it back in Clem's truck, 'cause mine's on blocks. Anyway, I [...]
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    Posted: August 20, 2009, 2:05am EDT

  • Sick

    In my conversations with conservative and libertarian friends, no matter what the issue, their position boils down to one issue: how are we going to pay for it?

    When they ask that, of course, they already know the answer. And if it doesn’t involve philanthropists or the benevolent private [...]
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    Posted: August 18, 2009, 10:57am EDT

  • SOFA recap, 8/16/09

    Coming back after a bye week, the Springfield Open Football Association braved a humid August afternoon in the sun…and the clouds…and the rain…and the wind…and the heat…and the coolness…and more sun…and even more humidity…essentially every type of non-catastrophic weather known to humankind, for an afternoon of - you’ll never guess [...]
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    Posted: August 17, 2009, 2:48am EDT

  • A timely comic strip from 1989



    I'd add something to this, but I don't think I can.
    [...]
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    Posted: August 14, 2009, 11:53am EDT

  • Running on fuming: Double standards

    When talking about the tactics of desperate Republicans, a common rebuttal is that, “Democrats do it too.” Whether or not Democrats actually are guilty of the same actions depends on the specific circumstance and is another debate altogether. Suffice to say, if the Democrats rationalized a dubious tactic by saying, [...]
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    Posted: August 13, 2009, 1:14pm EDT

  • Running on fuming: The equivalency card

    Conservatives play lots of cards these days. And, unfortunately, Texas Hold ’Em is not in their repertoire. Could have saved us all at least eight years of grief.

    One of these cards that isn’t talked about much is what I call the equivalency card: basically, that any criticism of [...]
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    Posted: August 12, 2009, 9:58am EDT

  • Running on fuming: Desperate tactics at work

    If the heated health care town hall protests prove anything, it’s that the conservative ideology is at the end of its rope. The twin frustrations of policy failure and losing has put their side, and the country as a whole, into a weaker position to improve our lot through bipartisan [...]
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    Posted: August 10, 2009, 12:39pm EDT

  • "LET ME ON-SER! UND I VILL TELL YOO WHY OBAMA IS NOT A GUT AMERIKAN!"

    I demand that Orly Taitz show us HER birth certificate. Because I suspect she was not born in the U.S., and I want to go on an extremely pointless and desperate crusade against her.



    Taitz represents everything that's wrong with the birthers, as well as many Obama [...]
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    Posted: August 05, 2009, 4:02pm EDT

  • When we ban torture, can we also ban tortured reasoning?

    Did you know that the Bible explicitly names Barack Obama as Satan? OMG!!



    This video makes a convincing case for Obama being the Anti-Christ. After all, Luke 10:18 clearly states - with a little help from some back-and-forth Babelfishing - that Satan's name is "Baraq Bamah." Oooooh!
    [...]
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    Posted: August 03, 2009, 11:19am EDT

  • This dialogue took place

    Setting: Leninaghdad, Czechoslonesiaran, August 1961.

    Bad Guy: "We must take power in the White House to spread our agenda."

    Another Bad Guy: "What is our agenda, again?"

    BG: "Socialism! Also, fascism. We are out to create a state where the people are entirely dependent on the government," [...]
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    Posted: July 30, 2009, 1:43am EDT

  • A birther bonanza

    Prompted by the latest wave of Obama birth certificate BS (and an oddly appropriate rerun of King of the Hill, in which Hank discovers he was actually born in New York City), I fished out my own birth certificate. You know, just to see if I was born and all. [...]
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    Posted: July 28, 2009, 1:32am EDT

  • This didn't help my stomach bug

    I won't blame you if you don't watch this.



    Sarah Palin's speeches are typically more of a test of physical endurance than an intellectual exercise. This one nauseates me for a different reason: it was actually relatively coherent. Shall we count the vomit-inducing ways?

    - Is [...]
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    Posted: July 27, 2009, 11:46am EDT

  • Health care clarification

    Obama's health care plan is NOT socialized medicine. In fact, those of us who actually want socialized, single-payer health care are disappointed that such an option remains taboo.

    The Democrats' health care plan proposes a "government option." What that means is, people can choose (key word there) to buy' [...]
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    Posted: July 26, 2009, 11:04am EDT

  • Caption Central

    Today's captions brought to you by the Party of No!



    --Hey, Obama, on your way to get your real birth certificate?
    --Look at the celebrity Obama, getting the red-carpet treatment
    --The Obamessiah walks on the blood of all the people socialized medicine's gonna [...]
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    Posted: July 23, 2009, 10:31am EDT

  • Poll-lemic

    It is my sincere hope that every one of these wingnut yokels currently gloating over Obama's supposedly low poll numbers is just as worshipful of them when they tilt in Obama's favor. As I recall, they were happy to have a president who took pride in laughing at polls, and [...]
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    Posted: July 22, 2009, 11:16am EDT

  • Walter Cronkite 1916-2009



     [...]
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    Posted: July 18, 2009, 12:24pm EDT

  • Since the comments are all the same anyway...

    I love puppies.

    Go.
    [...]
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    Posted: July 17, 2009, 11:16am EDT

  • A thought about racism

    Stripped of all physical and demographic attributes, Barack Obama and Sonia Sotomayor are intelligent, experienced and quick-thinking people at the core, well-suited for the highest levels of public service. Though race has played a key role in shaping their experiences, they'd be assets no matter who they were.

    Republicans,' [...]
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    Posted: July 15, 2009, 11:34am EDT

  • Sarah Palin, Red Dawn and other scary things

    - I've been following several online forums regarding Sarah Palin for the past few days, and I've come to the conclusion that she does in fact have a bright political future. Not because she's qualified - as if - but because leadership isn't what today's Republicans value. They want someone' [...]
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    Posted: July 14, 2009, 12:15pm EDT

  • Department of Defensive

    Rule #125: A bitter pill to swallow
    If the private sector is really the best source for health care, then a competitive government option shouldn't be the end of the world. Often lost in this debate is the word "option," which you think would stir the steamy juices of capitalism.' [...]
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    Posted: July 11, 2009, 12:51pm EDT

  • Things

    - As I get older, I realize just how grating it is to continually hear from baby boomers, "You missed out on..." That generation will go to its mass grave thinking it was the best thing to happen to recorded history. I guess every generation does that, but in the [...]
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    Posted: July 08, 2009, 12:50pm EDT

  • Sarah Palin, governor of ADD

    Can you imagine if, in late 2006, Barack Obama had resigned his Senate seat for no apparent reason? And then announced his presidential candidacy the following February? What would the massive fallout have been from the right?

    "Barack Obama is nothing but a terminally ambitious politician who will" [...]
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    Posted: July 04, 2009, 11:37am EDT

  • New rules

    Rule #122: Tonight's top HIStory
    It is possible to both follow world events AND mourn the death of Michael Jackson. You're not better than everyone else for alleging that the story is merely a distraction from developments in Iran and Honduras. The real distraction is CNN Headline News! And their' [...]
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    Posted: July 01, 2009, 11:34am EDT

  • Sanctuary, my extremity

    What is the point of bringing guns to church? Isn't the whole idea of church that it's a place where God will provide and protect you?

    In Kentucky, a pastor encouraged his flock to proudly sport their firearms while attending services this week. A gun raffle capped off' [...]
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    Posted: June 28, 2009, 11:19am EDT

  • My own Thriller

    Michael Jackson is dead. Wow.

    I had just arrived at work yesterday when I heard the news that Michael had been hospitalized. The newsroom buzzed like never before, partially because it was that rare Really Huge Story that doesn't seem to happen much anymore, but also because he'd had [...]
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    Posted: June 26, 2009, 8:15am EDT

  • New Rules (groaning over Bill Maher's New Rules)

    Rule #119: True outrage over false outrage
    If you hate Barack Obama, you have to just come out and say it. No more hiding behind the false outrage of the day, such as he's on TV too much, or he's taxing us enough already, blah blah blah.

    I'm tired' [...]
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    Posted: June 25, 2009, 11:51am EDT

  • Let's make a deal

    If I promise to visit you, bing.com, will you promise to stop airing those obnoxious commercials?

    Commercials. Television ads that air throughout the course of a show. Show. An entertainment program that can take many forms. TV. Stage. Screen. Screen. Can describe either a monitor, a long piece of [...]
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    Posted: June 24, 2009, 12:22pm EDT

  • Say cheese! Just don't smile when you say it

    According to reports, Virginia, Indiana, Nevada and Arkansas are asking people not to smile in driver's license photos. (I've since tossed out the links I originally had on this entry, because Arkansas, Nevada and Indiana have clarified that smiling is permitted, as long as it isn't exaggerated. Apparently, USA Today [...]
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    Posted: June 23, 2009, 12:20pm EDT

  • Not Right NFL Sunday (Non-Saints, June edition)

    The new head coach for the Kansas City Chiefs, Todd Haley, is being described in the media as the no-nonsense antidote to the touchy-feely Herm Edwards. And by "no-nonsense," they mean Haley is brusque, demanding and abrasive. The Bill Parcells protege is (amazingly enough) well-known for barking at and berating [...]
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    Posted: June 21, 2009, 10:40am EDT

  • Who are the real bastards here?

    In Iran, crowds are taking to the streets to protest an allegedly stolen presidential election. The impact of this could redefine the Middle Eastern nation, as well as the global political dynamic, for generations to come.

    Here in America, though, we have much more superfluous crap to worry about.
    [...]
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    Posted: June 18, 2009, 10:40am EDT

  • Fancy blog title

    Rule #115: Straw poll
    Just as finding a flaw in evolutionary theory doesn't make the Bible's account true, neither does disagreement with Barack Obama mean that one pines for a John McCain presidency. Do I agree with everything Obama's White House does? No. Did I think I would when I' [...]
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    Posted: June 16, 2009, 5:32pm EDT

  • Bait

    The first conservative or libertarian who wants to debate the issues here gets a cookie.

    I'm out of cookies.
    ' [...]
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    Posted: June 15, 2009, 12:47pm EDT

  • How well do you know me?

    1) Which if the following songs did I not dance to on July 3, 1988?
    a) "Can't You Hear My Heartbeat" by Herman's Hermits
    b) "Rock This Town" by Stray Cats
    c) "Mother-In-Law" by Ernie K-Doe
    d) "Wishing Well" by Terence Trent D'Arby

    2) Which movie did I not [...]
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    Posted: June 13, 2009, 4:31pm EDT

  • Blog fun for the day

    - I've noticed something of an inconsistency in the conservative mind-set. Shocking, I know.

    When discussing immigration, their refrain is, "They must follow the law; otherwise they are illegal." They will say they have no problem with anyone coming into this country who crosses all the right T's and [...]
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    Posted: June 10, 2009, 11:52am EDT

  • Heard on the radio two seconds ago

    White female DJ: "T-Pain has a new album coming out on Sept. 11."

    White male DJ: "Awww, no. Aren't we over this? Don't release your album on Sept. 11."

    "Especially a rap album."

    "I don't feel like buying a CD on Sept. 11. Couldn't you have done" [...]
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    Posted: June 08, 2009, 10:09am EDT

  • One of these guys is not like the others

    There's an old saying that goes, "In the United States, anyone can become president."

    This is often twisted into a joke with the punchline, "NOW I BELIEVE IT!"

    I first heard this joke about Bill Clinton, but it's probably been around at least since Millard Fillmore. And, I [...]
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    Posted: June 06, 2009, 11:31am EDT

  • Friday rules

    Rule #111: Be kind. I'm behind.
    Stop acting so surprised that I don't own a DVR. It's still not that common, particularly among those who live modestly and don't watch all that much television. I have a VCR built into my TV, which perfectly serves my purposes when I need [...]
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    Posted: June 05, 2009, 11:24am EDT

  • Suddenly, Michael Steele is that much closer to Denzel

    In February, I posted this challenge to conservatives:

    Republicans must create one good song. Do whatever it takes. Get a liberal to write one for you. Hell, I'll do it, and not ironically, either. I just feel sorry for you guys for having to pretend that "Bush Was'" [...]
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    Posted: June 04, 2009, 9:45am EDT

  • Deep breath...

    I originally started this blog yesterday, but deleted it because I was just too angry and all too willing to cover millions of people with the same gigantic blanket of condemnation. I'm still pretty pissed, and I doubt I ever won't be, over the murder of George Tiller.

    I'll' [...]
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    Posted: June 02, 2009, 12:10pm EDT

  • Old enough to go to school

    Not Right About Anything is five years old today. Wow! I don't do anything for five years. Except this Anything, apparently.

    Thanks for all your support and comments through the years. I'll keep it coming if you will (and even if you don't).


    ' [...]
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    Posted: June 01, 2009, 8:04pm EDT

  • Sunday rules!

    Rule #108: An Unfortunate Truth
    Al Gore is no longer an argument against environmental protections. Cast aside the dumb argument that he is the Pied Piper of manufactured ecological outrage (as if man-made pollution isn't obvious all over the place); the profit motive is also a weak accusation, because the' [...]
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    Posted: May 31, 2009, 10:46am EDT

  • Someone explain this one to me. Maybe I'm too manly to understand.

    On my way home from work late last night, I was waiting to turn left from a three-lane one-way street onto a divided highway. Some yahoo in a giant Ford pickup was in the center lane. When the light turned green, he cut me off by turning left (he had [...]
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    Posted: May 29, 2009, 11:55am EDT

  • Can he nominate four more as well?

    Obama nominates Sonia Sotomayor for Supreme Court

    If approved by the Senate, Sotomayor will be the first Hispanic to sit on the SCOTUS (maybe - definitely the first in a long while). She is considered a liberal judge, though she has had the support of presidents from both [...]
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    Posted: May 26, 2009, 12:17pm EDT

  • A Memorial Day thought

    When describing American military might, people often say:

    "If it weren't for us, the world would be speaking German!"

    I'm not suggesting that the sentiment behind it is misguided. But why single out "speaking German?" As if that's the worst thing that could have happened! This trivializes the' [...]
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    Posted: May 25, 2009, 12:38am EDT

  • New rules

    Rule #105: Queasy rider
    Stop decrying motorcycle-helmet laws as affronts to "personal freedom." There is a reason motorists are required to wear seat belts, be sober, drive safe vehicles and follow traffic laws, and it's got nothing to do with infringing upon "personal freedom." See, the thing about public highways' [...]
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    Posted: May 24, 2009, 10:44am EDT

  • Question inspired by actual events

    If your wedding day is the best day of your life, then isn't it all downhill from there?
    ' [...]
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    Posted: May 23, 2009, 12:33pm EDT

  • My dreams are jerks

    I have this recurring nightmare.



    No, not that.

    The nightmare involves my middle and high school English teachers and my gifted classmates. The premise: it's the present day, and even though we now live all over the country, we regularly come together' [...]
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    Posted: May 22, 2009, 12:34pm EDT

  • An important distinction

    The United States does not have a capitalist government; it has a capitalist economy. The democratic-republic government is about running the country; the economy is about moving goods and services and making a profit.

    Both have much to learn from each other. The government can learn lessons about being [...]
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    Posted: May 20, 2009, 12:16pm EDT

  • Note to Blogger

    Thanks to my browser (one I don't typically use) garbling up my site, I accidentally flagged my own blog. You can disregard that, unless of course you agree. But I hope you don't. Thank you. [...]
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    Posted: May 19, 2009, 5:21pm EDT

  • One map that isn't red enough


    Visited 16 states (32%)
    Create your own visited map of The United States

    When I last did this map a few years ago, I had been to 11 states, basically a flat stripe across part of the bottom of the country. I've taken lots of' [...]
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    Posted: May 19, 2009, 12:09pm EDT

  • Rush Limbaugh: Material Girl

    There is a disease sweeping America, and it is epitomized by Rush Limbaugh. No, not obesity, though that's a problem as well. Smoking is also a good guess. Swine flu? Getting ever warmer.

    Rather, it's the idea that success equals money, and money equals success. That's the American Dream,' [...]
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    Posted: May 18, 2009, 10:56am EDT

  • Just one more thing Back to the Future II got wrong



    They just keep piling up, don't they? Flying cars. Hoverboards. Hydrators. Home fusion reactors. Slamball. Extremely colorful clothes. Rejuvenation clinics. Alpha-rhythm sleep-inducing generators (well, maybe that last one won't be missed). And did I mention hoverboards?

    And let's not forget the things that' [...]
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    Posted: May 16, 2009, 12:30pm EDT

  • If Lil Jon drove a Chrysler, he'd be gettin' clunk

    Analysts wonder why American car companies are in such bad shape. I have a few theories:

    1) Jellybeans taste good, but they don't give you much street cred.

    2) When you drive a classic or otherwise old car, it can be fun to tinker with the guts and' [...]
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    Posted: May 14, 2009, 12:33pm EDT

  • Something I've never been able to say before

    I've been to Kansas.

    Yes, it was a wrong turn in a Kansas City neighborhood, but that's how I find most things. I probably would have struggled to find the state line on purpose.

    In any case, I now know how Real Americans live.
    [...]
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    Posted: May 10, 2009, 9:54am EDT

  • Go Chiefs! No, not really

    - I'm in Kansas City today, on my first-ever outing here. When I got here yesterday afternoon, something about the city struck me - whereas most cities I've seen are surrounded by a cluster of hotels and fast-food restaurants, K.C. is not, at least along U.S. 71. I actually passed [...]
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    Posted: May 09, 2009, 9:36am EDT

  • The system isn't screwed

    Lately I've been involved in some very heated conversations, here and elsewhere, about the state of the U.S. government. Some of these have gotten decidedly personal. I'm sorry this has occurred, because I consider many of these people good real-life friends and intelligent to boot. Perhaps part of it is [...]
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    Posted: May 07, 2009, 12:15pm EDT

  • Too perfect

    This graphic (created by a Republican, not sure who) encapsulates literally everything that is wrong with today's GOP, save perhaps for the lack of the words "tax" and "cut":


    Now that's a fair sentiment, spoken by perhaps the best Republican ever, Abraham Lincoln, though [...]
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    Posted: May 06, 2009, 12:03pm EDT

  • New rules

    Rule #101: Itchy Rich
    The rich have sufficient clout in Washington without your constant coddling. The recent tea parties protested over-taxation, a curious development considering that President Obama has lowered taxes for everyone earning under $250,000 a year. Given the unlikely possibility that the protesters were anywhere near that income [...]
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    Posted: May 04, 2009, 12:11pm EDT

  • Too soon?

    Who knew Bob Dole would outlive Jack Kemp?

    Click on the audioblog below (from January 2006) to hear about my own personal (near) encounter with Jack Kemp in 1996:

    [...]
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    Posted: May 03, 2009, 11:00am EDT

  • Rule city

    Rule #94: No jacket required
    Barack Obama can wear whatever he wants in the White House. George W. Bush installed a restrictive dress code that even he didn't follow, which was supposed to be a statement of respect and dignity. Funny, I don't remember the Founding Fathers ever wearing jackets. [...]
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    Posted: May 01, 2009, 12:33pm EDT

  • Gun-clingers and other swine

    Got this from a member of the Louisiana Republican State Central Committee:

    Friends— Please take a moment to complete the following form within the next 24 hours. I have been a member of the NRA for years and for the first time in my memory the NRA is offering [...]
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    Posted: April 29, 2009, 11:56am EDT

  • Conservatives skeptical of Obama's birth

    WASHINGTON - A leading coalition of conservative politicians and pundits on Monday expressed continued skepticism over President Barack Obama's birth.

    The group, known as Barack Obama's Miracle Birth Augments Socialist Tyranny (BOMBAST), is led by U.S. Sen. Richard Shelby (R-Ala.), a leading critic of Obama's legitimacy as commander-in-chief.
    [...]
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    Posted: April 27, 2009, 1:23pm EDT

  • "Wrong" doesn't get much wronger than this



    I thought it was bizarre enough that Plaster Sports Complex, the football stadium of Missouri State University, was a 45-minute drive out of the way of the school, on the outskirts of the outskirts of town. But my own university's football stadium was a' [...]
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    Posted: April 25, 2009, 2:34pm EDT

  • Whatever happened to, "shut up and sing?"


    Above: The 2012 Republican convention (nomination speech).

    Carrie Prejean is being hailed by Republicans everywhere for defending "traditional marriage" at the Miss USA pageant, and essentially losing as a result. I put "traditional marriage" in quotes, because it's a terrible, terrible term, and I' [...]
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    Posted: April 24, 2009, 12:06pm EDT

  • Things I'm thinking about

    - The infamous RedFlex speed vans are being pulled from both Louisiana and Arizona after someone murdered a van driver in Phoenix. Apparently, this is where the company draws the line - not at squelching constitutional rights, not at corporate carpetbagging, not at widespread public opposition, not even at [...]
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    Posted: April 22, 2009, 11:13am EDT

  • New rules

    Rule #91: Ballpark figure
    If sports stadiums must be named after corporate sponsors, then said sponsors must have some tangential connection to sports. Rawlings Park. Wilson Field. Riddell Arena. Hell, those almost sound like actual names. Enough with this cell phone and bank shit! Just because you have all the [...]
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    Posted: April 21, 2009, 10:49am EDT
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