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Misanthropic Review

  • Well, jeez, what does Susan have to say about movies these days?

    Number of comments: 1
    It's official! Took me awhile to get my act together, but thanks to Alicia, I've got new digs and you are invited inside!*My new, improved movie site will have reviews AND other stuff. So head on over to Susan Year Itch to hear what I have to say about In' [...]
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    Posted: April 09, 2009, 9:21am EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • Revolutionary Road: Settling down is a bitch

    Number of comments: 0
    4.5 starsSam Mendes doesn't direct a ton of movies. His first cinematic release was American Beauty, you know, that little film that tapped Hollywood on the shoulder, swiveled it around, and ordered it to take notice (you thought I was going to say "punched it in the face" didn't you? [...]
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    Posted: January 21, 2009, 10:16am EST
    by Susan Howson

  • Doubt: When the system breaks down

    Number of comments: 0
    4.5 starsSo there are movies and there are movies. And there are Meryl Streep movies. Guys, can she deliver a bad performance? Negative. There are a hundred reasons why you should see Doubt, adapted from John Patrick Shanley's play of the same name (Shanley adapted it for the screen and' [...]
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    Posted: January 20, 2009, 1:13pm EST
    by Susan Howson

  • Gran Torino: One million reasons to hate this movie

    Number of comments: 4
    2 starsI will now repeat what I have stomped around shouting in the days since I watched Gran Torino: 1. Clint Eastwood is not a good director. Maybe he was once, but he is no longer choosing good scripts, and this script was utterly awful. He was also the only [...]
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    Posted: January 20, 2009, 1:07pm EST
    by Susan Howson

  • Valkyrie: Just ignore the angry little one-eyed guy

    Number of comments: 0
    4 starsI enjoyed this film. I know! I'm just as surprised as you are. Tom Cruise, wearing an eyepatch, speaks German, and I still like this movie. Director Bryan Singer is the reason, of course. You may know him best as the brilliant (yes, I said brilliant!) director of the' [...]
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    Posted: December 30, 2008, 1:44pm EST
    by Susan Howson

  • Milk: Moving backwards and forwards

    Number of comments: 1
    Rating - 7/10I'm still convinced that biopics win Oscars a little too blindly because people tend to confuse not only good acting with a good impression but, even more inaccurately, they mistake an important life with an important film, but in recent years I'm less grumpy about these cinematic biographies. [...]
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    Posted: December 18, 2008, 10:31am EST
    by Susan Howson

  • Synecdoche, New York

    Number of comments: 1
    There's a certain kind of movie that pulls you in with a tractor beam and rivets your corneas so that you relish every detail and miss it once it's over with the sort of ache you reserve for a recently-departed romance. Synecdoche, New York, the new screenplay and directing debut [...]
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    Posted: December 10, 2008, 9:57am EST
    by Susan Howson

  • Australia: It won't kill you

    Number of comments: 1
    3 starsI have mixed feelings about Baz Luhrmann, the director of this Thanksgiving's big epic monster, Australia. His signature "offbeat" style began as heartwarmingly quirky in Strictly Ballroom (1992)*, progressed to teen mindblowing in Romeo + Juliet (1996), and culminating in the oversaturated, self-indulgent mess that is Moulin Rouge (2001).' [...]
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    Posted: December 02, 2008, 12:09pm EST
    by Susan Howson

  • Quantum of Solace: Bond's revenge!

    Number of comments: 0
    3.5 stars Daniel Craig striding out of the water in those blue swim trunks in Casino Royale is this generation's Marilyn Monroe over the subway vent. That is to say, "something" about Casino Royale elevated that Bond movie out of the recession of the Pierce Brosnan years. I mean, we' [...]
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    Posted: November 19, 2008, 12:12pm EST
    by Susan Howson

  • Rachel Getting Married: Wah Wah

    Number of comments: 0
    3 starsAs I write this, I don't "know" who the next president will be. I'm trying really hard to not think about the bottle of champagne I have in the fridge and instead force myself to think about friggin' Rachel Getting Married, the new Jonathan Demme flick. This film is' [...]
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    Posted: November 06, 2008, 8:37am EST
    by Susan Howson

  • W:....Is a real dude, turns out!

    Number of comments: 1
    4 starsHere are three things you should know about Oliver Stone's new film W before you go (and you should go) see it. 1. W is not a comedy!I sort of assumed this from the ads, but luckily someone warned me before I went. I mean, sometimes it's funny that [...]
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    Posted: October 28, 2008, 9:31am EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • America's Two Favorite Pastimes

    Number of comments: 1
    It's not often that I go to ESPN.com, typing in the URL tentatively, as if it's an address someone has given me in an unfamiliar city, and I have to read it to the cab driver from the airport, not knowing how to pronounce the street name, and turning bright [...]
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    Posted: October 28, 2008, 9:29am EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • Ghost Town: Why not?

    Number of comments: 0
    Guys! I am so behind. I keep writing for other places and forgetting to post here because, well, it's October and things are happening.3.5 starsI found myself in New York (for those of you who have a map on their basement wall with pins in it, following my progress around' [...]
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    Posted: October 28, 2008, 9:24am EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • Transsiberian: Trip of a lifetime!

    Number of comments: 1
    2.5 starsLadies and gentlemen, Transsiberian finally made its way transamerica (whoa, another movie) to Richmond, VA amid accolades and fanfare and a Rotten Tomatoes rating of like 5000. And I could not be more excited about it!* Yes, this whimsical romp is about two American tourists, Jessie (Emily Mortimer) and [...]
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    Posted: September 24, 2008, 10:50am EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • Tell No One: Begone, cynics!

    Number of comments: 0
    Also from RVAnews!4.5 starsSo I think I have a real problem with expressing emotion. If my mother is reading this right now she is spitting out her warm spiced milk, or whatever moms drink, and smacking her head in disbelief that I JUST NOW realized this. Well, I didn’t JUST [...]
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    Posted: September 23, 2008, 11:38pm EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • Tropic Thunder: A sweaty, dirty, ray of sunshine

    Number of comments: 0
    I've been behind on posting things lately! Writing them but not posting! This is from like a month ago on RVAnews. But it is still filled with passion.4 starsI read a folk story once about this guy who was lost in the woods for some weeks and found some old' [...]
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    Posted: September 23, 2008, 11:34pm EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • Pineapple Express: Fail

    Number of comments: 0
    2 starsI don't feel like I oscillate too much in my opinion of movies. The five star (with half stars!) rating system works pretty well for me. I find that it offers enough shades of grey to differentiate a movie I might like due to fond nostalgia but upon an' [...]
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    Posted: August 13, 2008, 11:37am EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • The Dark Knight: It's a real movie!

    Number of comments: 2
    4.5 starsGuys, I want to cry when I think about how much Christopher Nolan is giving me hope for the future of filmmaking. No, seriously. The Dark Knight is a real movie! With real editing and acting and a neat score and everything! It's like Michael Clayton if George Clooney' [...]
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    Posted: July 23, 2008, 10:44am EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • Hellboy II: The Golden Zzzz

    Number of comments: 0
    2.5 starsYou have to admit that it's almost not worth me writing a review of anything like Hellboy, a comic book character that I happen to know nothing about but you happen to know everything about. If I say it's phenomenal, purists will turn up their noses and insist that [...]
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    Posted: July 17, 2008, 10:48am EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • Hooked on Classics: A DVD Roundup

    Number of comments: 0
    I honestly wrote an uppity sentence about how sometimes I have "things to do", "people," and I can't "flit off to the movies every five seconds" just to "compete with Daniel Neman," who gets to do this as a full-time job, I might add. But since the meat of my' [...]
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    Posted: July 10, 2008, 9:57am EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • Wall-E: The future is grim yet gleeful.

    Number of comments: 1
    4.5 starsWell, I saw Wall-E last night, and I've had 24 hours to mull it over. 24 hours that I've been spending pulling gravel out of my hair from the Virginia Center Commons parking lot, upon which I crumbled, overcome with emotion, after some animated robots ripped my heart to [...]
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    Posted: July 02, 2008, 9:35am EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • The Happening: The trouble with Nighty

    Number of comments: 2
    1 starWhile this review does contain more plot than I normally like to reveal, i.e. greater than 5%, I wouldn't exactly call it a "spoiler." I figure if you go to see The Happening, it'll be purely to experience the magic that is M. Night Shamyalan and the pitiful rat [...]
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    Posted: June 18, 2008, 1:15pm EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • The Visitor: Viva summer blockbusters!

    Number of comments: 1
    Thomas McCarthy, 20082 stars I don't know about you, but I started the summer off with a bang. Typically skeptical of summer blockbusters, I was surprised to notice how many of them this year seemed to actually interest me. It's early June, and I've already seen three huge-budget films. I' [...]
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    Posted: June 11, 2008, 12:25pm EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • Sex and the City: Yeah, I went there.

    Number of comments: 4
    4 stars (yes! FOUR stars!)So the other night I put my brand new marriage* in jeopardy during what began as a pleasant post-honeymoon dinner with my sister and her husband. I'd masterfully steered the conversation towards movies, a skill I've acquired to mask the fact that I'm generally oblivious to' [...]
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    Posted: June 04, 2008, 10:29am EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • Forgetting Sarah Marshall: Forget those flaws!

    Number of comments: 0
    3.5 starsSometimes it's tough to like Judd Apatow. I liked The 40 Year Old Virgin, loved Knocked Up, and tolerated Superbad -- it's not really the movies themselves that provoke these qualms. It's the fact that the guy puts out a few good movies and all of a sudden he's [...]
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    Posted: April 24, 2008, 7:47am EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • Leatherheads: George, Let's never talk about this again

    Number of comments: 1
    I'm really hoping that this is comedy's year. The Oscars are slowly reflecting America's fatigue of big, sweeping epics in favor of more detailed and experimental character studies (a result of our war weariness perhaps?), and in the last couple of years, little, well-made comedies have inched closer and closer' [...]
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    Posted: April 11, 2008, 10:45am EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • Run Fatboy Run: A pleasant jog down memory lane

    Number of comments: 0
    4 stars (from my review at RVAnews!) It's easy (and fun!) to scoff away at films that recycle old devices and try to pass them off as new. Usually that sort of thing makes me furious...or at least annoyed and/or whiny. But sometimes a movie will follow a path that is so [...]
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    Posted: April 02, 2008, 9:28am EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • VCU French Film Festival 2008

    Number of comments: 0
    (repost of my article at RVAnews!) The VCU French Film Festival! An annual three day event during which Richmonders stampede the Byrd Theatre like eager vessels for French directors to fill up with their wisdom! A time for us to wonder while we stand in line how we possibly got so [...]
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    Posted: April 01, 2008, 11:41am EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • Funny Games: Worst Date Movie Ever

    Number of comments: 4
    4 stars The funniest thing about Funny Games is how spitting mad it made Roger Ebert. Ebert is one of my favorite movie critics. He’s concise, he’s passionate, and he judges big budget movies and independent movies by the same criteria (although sometimes I wish those criteria were a little harsher). [...]
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    Posted: March 19, 2008, 9:30am EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day: The Art of Elegant Comedy

    Number of comments: 0
    from my review at RVANews! 4 stars Darlings. I write this to you from my silken boudoir, perched on a heap of dressing gowns, money, and servants. Yes, that is correct. I have abandoned my boring, polyester world for a life within a screwball comedy from the 1930s. And who can blame [...]
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    Posted: March 14, 2008, 9:27am EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • Wake Me for the Summer Blockbusters

    Number of comments: 0
    (from my article at RVANews!) It’s going to be a bleak time in movie theaters for a little while.* The Oscars are over, but the world’s not ready for this year’s roster of superhero sequels. The weather is slightly better, but not mild enough to really embrace any notion one might [...]
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    Posted: March 05, 2008, 12:25pm EST
    by Susan Howson

  • Be Kind Rewind: 2.5 Stars. Be Kind Rewind's Version of Ghostbusters: 5 Stars.

    Number of comments: 1
    2.5 stars According to me, Michele Gondry is very creative at putting together music videos, but he shouldn’t bother making full-length films. According to everyone else I know, he burst forth from the head of Orson Welles with camera in hand. I’m prepared to accept that divergence, seeing as how my [...]
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    Posted: February 27, 2008, 9:39am EST
    by Susan Howson

  • George Clooney's Oscar Predictions

    Number of comments: 0
    But who are you going to believe? A cinematic genius or a tenderhearted girl in Virginia? HMM? Here are George Clooney's Oscar Predictions. Although I'm sure the Cloonz will take home the gold (oh, crap, sorry George, there IS no gold for Best Oscar Predictor),* I'll still be interested to see if [...]
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    Posted: February 22, 2008, 12:56pm EST
    by Susan Howson

  • 2008 Oscar Predictions, or The Second Annual Academy Award Cupcake Extravaganza

    Number of comments: 1
    from RVANews, of course! My annual exhaustive list of what’s going to win Academy Awards, what should win Academy Awards, and the wisdom to see the difference. (For the full list of nominees, go to Oscar.com. I left out some categories because I got bored trying to pretend like I knew [...]
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    Posted: February 20, 2008, 12:05pm EST
    by Susan Howson

  • The Savages: There's Gray on the Horizon

    Number of comments: 2
    Tamara Jenkins, 20074 stars Greetings, good people! I have been enjoying three days of a work conference in yon Colonial Williamsburg! Everything is so pleasant here; there are guys in three-cornered hats, sheep safely grazing, and everywhere is the scent of a wood-burning stove. The only blight on this “revolutionary experience,” [...]
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    Posted: February 13, 2008, 7:53am EST
    by Susan Howson

  • Your Turn for 2008 Oscar Predictions (Make Me Proud!)

    Number of comments: 0
    Over at RVANews, Ross has put together (with astonishingly little help from yours truly, who can really only be described as "lazy" and "good for nothing") a nice 2008 Oscar Pick 'em that all may enjoy! The so-called prize is two tickets to Richmond's Westhampton Theater*, but the REAL prize [...]
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    Posted: February 12, 2008, 7:15am EST
    by Susan Howson

  • Cloverfield: NYC Can't Catch a Break

    Number of comments: 3
    2.5 stars (from my review at RVAnews!) This is what happened. I saw Cloverfield on a Friday night, a fair amount of my friends saw it Saturday night, and our Monday morning nerded-out IM conversations went something like this (loosely translated):* Me: A pleasant Monday morning to you! Them: And also to you! [...]
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    Posted: January 31, 2008, 12:56pm EST
    by Susan Howson

  • There Will Be Blood: A Nice Clean Drama This Is Not

    Number of comments: 1
    Paul Thomas Anderson, 2007 4.5 stars Paul Thomas Anderson, acclaimed director of quirky hits such as Magnolia, Boogie Nights, and Punch-Drunk Love, has finally struck oil instead of silver with There Will Be Blood. And when I say “struck oil,” I mean struck so much oil that the intensity of the success [...]
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    Posted: January 23, 2008, 9:48am EST
    by Susan Howson

  • Golden Globes 2008: The HFPA Is Back!

    Number of comments: 0
    (from my article at RVAnews!) I think a fair amount of people will agree with me when I say that I was more than slightly relieved that the Golden Globes were downgraded to a press conference this year due to the Writers Guild strike.* Not that I anticipate the ol’ Globes [...]
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    Posted: January 16, 2008, 10:40am EST
    by Susan Howson

  • Atonement: A First World Tragedy in Three Acts

    Number of comments: 0
    Joe Wright, 2007 4.5 stars (from my review at RVAnews) I’m upset because it’s probably not feasible to watch Atonement every day. Seeing it in theaters, certainly, is impractical after three or four times. I mean, I have to eat, after all. Then I guess I could buy it on DVD, but even [...]
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    Posted: January 03, 2008, 9:28am EST
    by Susan Howson

  • I Am Legend: Nice Try, But I'm Still Dreaming About Johnny Depp, Not Zombies

    Number of comments: 0
    Francis Lawrence, 2007 (from my review at RVAnews!) 2/5 I am writing this to you while the one thousand skinny fingers of contagion scrape against my windows and infected faces press against the glass. JK, I’m fine. It’s the wind blowing branches against my house. And luckily for me, any terror that [...]
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    Posted: December 19, 2007, 10:03am EST
    by Susan Howson

  • Juno: It's Everything It's Cracked Up to Be, But You Didn't Hear It from Me

    (from my review at RVAnews!) 5/5! Remember when you went to see Napoleon Dynamite for the first time, and all your friends were like “Dude, you are going to lose it because it is all so hilarious,” and they ended up being totally right because you totally lost it, and you guys [...]
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    Posted: December 12, 2007, 9:09am EST
    by Susan Howson

  • The Golden Compass: Do It for the Daemons

    Number of comments: 5
    Chris Weitz, 2007 4 stars! (from my review at RVAnews) "The producer of the American Pie movies made a film adaptation of my favorite book." The very idea is enough to cause one's chest to constrict in horror, even as you scramble to get to an advance screening. Even thinking about it now, after [...]
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    Posted: December 05, 2007, 9:47am EST
    by Susan Howson

  • An Advent Calendar of Christmas Movies

    Number of comments: 3
    (from an article I wrote this week at RVAnews!) One year, in my usual burst of holiday glee, I Netflixed every Christmas movie I could think of, and the result was that I watched all the traditional favorites (you know, A Christmas Story, It's a Wonderful Life, etc.), and it didn't [...]
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    Posted: November 28, 2007, 11:53am EST
    by Susan Howson

  • Om Shanti Om and a Little Bollywood Primer for the Rest of Us

    Farah Khan, 2007 (from my review at RVAnews) It is certainly possible that you are thinking, "A Bollywood movie? Aren't you going out on a limb here?" But listen up, people. I have a proposal. Are you tired of the endless onslaught of Britney paparrazzi video clips? Sick of seeing Brangelina all over [...]
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    Posted: November 21, 2007, 10:21am EST
    by Susan Howson

  • The Wendell Baker Story: Wilson Jackpot

    4/5 (From my review at RVAnews) The Wendell Baker Story is a simple, heartfelt picture that slipped through the cracks after its initial limited release in 2005. Distributing it nationally in spring 2007 did little to increase its popularity, but its November 2007 release on DVD might just be the ticket to [...]
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    Posted: November 14, 2007, 10:28am EST
    by Susan Howson

  • American Gangster: Way to Go.

    Number of comments: 1
    Ridley Scott, 2007 2.5/5 (from my latest review at RVAnews!) It seems that Ridley Scott and I are at odds again. Although this ensuing tension with the esteemed director of Gladiator and Alien (and Legend!) might cause some awkwardness at all those celebrity parties I attend on a daily basis, it's not my [...]
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    Posted: November 07, 2007, 9:34am EST
    by Susan Howson

  • Wondering about 3:10 to Yuma?

    Number of comments: 1
    Guys! Just in time for the Oscar hopefuls to ramp up their attempts, I'm writing reviews for RVAnews.com, which is the latest greatest thing to hit the Richmond internet-waves. It launches today, and a couple of my reviews are already up there, including a brand-new one for 3:10 to Yuma [...]
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    Posted: October 31, 2007, 9:38am EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • The Darjeeling Limited: Can We Talk, Wes?

    Wes Anderson, 2007 Dear Wes Anderson, Hey buddy! It was good to see you again the other day! I was glad to see the color and substance return to your films -- that Life Aquatic period of yours made you look pretty weak and tired, but The Darjeeling Limited really let me [...]
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    Posted: October 08, 2007, 2:28pm EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • Transformers: Finally Understanding Optimus Primelots

    Number of comments: 3
    Michael Bay, 2007 7/10 For someone who has never seen an episode of this apparently life-altering cartoon that was created to market toys, Transformers sure isn't a difficult movie to follow. And even if I wasn't following the basic (er, only) premise - (bad guys want to take over the universe, good [...]
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    Posted: September 19, 2007, 10:25am EDT
    by Susan Howson

  • The Nanny Diaries: Apologies In Advance

    Shari Springer Berman and Robert Pulcini, 2007 3/10 I wasnt completely against going to see The Nanny Diaries. In fact, I truly enjoyed the book of the same name. Its chick lit, for sure, but its good chick lit, and I allowed my hope that the film would echo the book in [...]
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    Posted: September 14, 2007, 4:20pm EDT
    by Susan

  • Superbad: Not Superbad, but not Supergood either

    Number of comments: 10
    Greg Mottola, 2007 5/10 Maybe its the fact that I was never a teenage boy, or maybe its the fact that I was distracted by the giant diamond engagement ring on my finger, but I just couldnt fully embrace Superbad with the big warm hug it wanted me to give it. Instead, [...]
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    Posted: August 29, 2007, 2:44pm EDT
    by Susan

  • Becoming Jane: Free Smelling Salts with Every Ticket

    Number of comments: 2
    Julian Jarrold, 2007 6/10 Becoming Jane is easy to describe in one sentence: a cheap trick designed to lure in the dreamy escapist ladies who start to panic during those years without Pride and Prejudice adaptations. Luckily, I am one of those dreamy escapist ladies, and although the rational part of me [...]
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    Posted: August 20, 2007, 8:24am EDT
    by Susan

  • The Bourne Ultimatum: When I Was Bourne for the Third Time

    Number of comments: 1
    2007, Paul Greengrass (guest review by Kelly!, who gives 6 out of 10 stars) The previews shown before The Bourne Ultimatum were the semiannual Wahlberg, Washington, and Foxx films about corruption and responsibility, and all were choppy and strangely colored (a bright tint of a washed out urban setting is [...]
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    Posted: August 14, 2007, 9:10am EDT
    by Susan

  • You Kill Me: (It Won't Really Kill You But It Might Pullman-ate You)

    John Dahl, 2007 8 out of 10 stars (from my review at Lost At Sea) I have a theory about mob movies and the way we perceive them in the 21st Century. I believe we have absorbed Tony Soprano as our “real mobster” baseline, and therefore every film or television show that attempts [...]
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    Posted: August 06, 2007, 1:27pm EDT
    by Susan

  • Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix: Remember Us? The FILMS?

    Number of comments: 1
    David Yates, 2007 4 out of 5 stars (from my review at Lost At Sea) A few hours before I sat through the endless fantasy-type previews that predicated Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (yes, you may refer to it as Harry Potter Is Disturbingly Muscular if you like), my favorite [...]
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    Posted: July 23, 2007, 5:35pm EDT
    by Susan

  • Gifted and Talented: It's Like a Movie but You Can Bring Your Own Candy

    Gifted and Talented Awesome people, 2007 Q. What is this and where are your hilarious movie reviews? A. Look, I have been on vacation in the Caribbean followed by a business trip in Minnesota, in addition to slowly and laboriously completing a big school project, so unless you can find me a movie [...]
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    Posted: July 20, 2007, 9:34am EDT
    by Susan

  • Ratatouille: Bring Snacks

    Number of comments: 3
    Brad Bird, 2007 4 out of 5 stars (from my review at Lost At Sea) Remember when Pixar was so insecure about the way their newfangled technology represented humans that they only sporadically showed them – always in a rush and always only bit by bit? Now, as my moviegoing friend reminded me, [...]
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    Posted: July 11, 2007, 11:44am EDT
    by Susan

  • Ocean's 13: A Three-quel I Can Get Behind

    Number of comments: 2
    Steven Soderbergh, 2007 (from my review at Lost At Sea) Recently, I made some sweeping statements about the seemingly indefatigable trajectory of trilogies as of late, fueled by my bitter and almost personally offended disappointment in the final installment of Pirates of the Caribbean. One is enough! I said. Two is indulgent, [...]
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    Posted: June 21, 2007, 11:22am EDT
    by Susan

  • Waitress Is the New Chocolat

    Number of comments: 4
    Adrienne Shelly, 20074 out of 5 stars(from my review at Lost At Sea) It has been a long time since I left a movie theater feeling excellent. Awestruck, yes. Moved, certainly. But happy and inspired and benevolent towards all humanity? Not until Adrienne Shelly’s Waitress. You would think that the [...]
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    Posted: June 08, 2007, 5:40pm EDT
    by Susan

  • Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End (Finally)

    Number of comments: 4
    Gore Verbinski, 2007 3 out of 5 stars(from my review at Lost At Sea) The inside of Captain Jack Sparrow’s brain is a marvellous thing: richly detailed, over the top, and full to the brim with nonsense. Disney’s new Pirates of the Caribbean installment, At World’s End, occasionally opens a tiny [...]
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    Posted: May 30, 2007, 4:44pm EDT
    by Susan

  • Best of the Two-Cent Reviews (for Your Convenience)

    I'm starting a new feature because I am both lazy and productive at the same time. Here are some of the most awesome Two-Cent Reviews lately from my Netflix friends. Feel free to disagree. What are Two-Cent Reviews, you say, old boy? If you're a part of the Netflix community (and [...]
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    Posted: May 23, 2007, 1:05pm EDT
    by Susan

  • 28 Weeks Later: 28 Dollars Later

    Juan Carlos Fresnadillo, 2007 (Guest Review by Cam DiNunzio - Editor's Note: I am so determined that this film will be terrible that I actually bitterly disagreed with this review to poor Cam, WITHOUT HAVING ACTUALLY SEEN THE FILM, because that is how strongly I feel that 28 Days Later should [...]
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    Posted: May 21, 2007, 3:19pm EDT
    by Susan

  • Hot Fuzz: S*** Gets Real

    Number of comments: 1
    Edgar Wright, 2007 4.5 out of 5 stars From my review on Lost At Sea! Break out your wallets, because I am back, and I’m going to tell you a little story about a movie you need to see immediately. That means immediately, like right now, before seeing Spider-Man 3 and before it [...]
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    Posted: May 17, 2007, 1:22pm EDT
    by Susan

  • TMNT: Turtles in a Post-1990 World

    Number of comments: 6
    Kevin Munroe, 2007 3.5 out of 5 stars The morning of TMNT’s opening day (and I hope everyone knows I’m talking about Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles), I sent around an email to everyone I know announcing my plans to go see it that evening. I expected not just prompt [...]
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    Posted: April 03, 2007, 9:29am EDT
    by Susan

  • The Host: Lizard-Alien-Fish Terrorizes Its Way Into Our Hearts

    Number of comments: 3
    Joon-Ho Bong, 20064.5 out of 5 stars I feel so effusive and enthusiastic about The Host that I’m worried I may come across as one of those Reading Rainbow book reviewers from when we were kids (“And what happens when you take your magical flying shoes to school? The best [...]
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    Posted: March 27, 2007, 4:46pm EDT
    by Susan

  • 300: It May Be Just 300 Dudes to You, But It's 600 Biceps to Me

    Number of comments: 8
    Zack Snyder, 2007 3.5 stars* Things I learned from 300: Spartans are the hottest ancient Greeks, Persia’s king was an eight-foot-tall drag queen, and shirts should really be optional as they serve no purpose except to limit a (my) healthy appreciation of pectoral muscles. Surely there must be something else to say about [...]
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    Posted: March 14, 2007, 10:00am EDT
    by Susan

  • Zodiac: 2008 Academy Award Predictions Begin Now

    Number of comments: 6
    David Fincher, 2007 The Oscars are exhausting for those of us who obsess about films – weeks of predictions and nail-biting, followed by a few days of scoffing and/or gloating. The weeks after the Academy Awards are usually a nice breather for me. Usually there’s a dearth of good movies in [...]
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    Posted: March 06, 2007, 10:00am EST
    by Susan

  • Casino Royale: Redux

    Number of comments: 2
    (Kelly already penned a review of this that I posted when this film came out, but I needed to write one of my own for WotBN.net since it's playing at the Byrd right now, so I figured I'd share it. Take a gander at it while I do some online [...]
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    Posted: February 26, 2007, 8:56am EST
    by Susan

  • The Painted Veil: Cholera Trumps Your Relationship Problems, FYI.

    Number of comments: 1
    (From my review at lostatsea.net) John Curran, 2006 It’s difficult to pinpoint what it is that’s wrong with The Painted Veil, since it includes a fair amount of likeable aspects. Great acting? Check. Breathtaking cinematography? Check. Moving situations to which we all can relate? Well, the “punishing your cheating wife by [...]
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    Posted: February 21, 2007, 9:00am EST
    by Susan

  • Important Info for Film Enthusiasts Including the Retirement of the Term "Film Enthusiast"

    Number of comments: 1
    1. The Academy Awards will cause you to lose your eyesight. Or, in a less dramatic way of putting it that my doctor kept insisting on using, watching a ton of movies in a short timespan may cause you to notice that your eyesight has deteriorated naturally. Therefore, the Academy [...]
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    Posted: February 15, 2007, 10:25am EST
    by Susan

  • Flushed Away: Rats, Toilets, Brilliance, Not Kidding

    (From my review at WotBN.net) I honestly never thought I’d say this about a movie that revolves around rats and sewers, but Flushed Away was denied an Oscar nomination. Possibly this is because no one actually saw the film, due to its incredibly poor marketing. If you remember, this film was [...]
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    Posted: February 06, 2007, 9:45am EST
    by Susan

  • Babel: Crash 2 - This Time With Skill

    Number of comments: 1
    (From my review at lostatsea.net) Alejandro Inarritu, 2007 Like many of you, I was shocked and dismayed to hear the news last year that Paul Haggis’s mediocre-at-best film Crash had won Best Picture at the 78th Annual Academy Awards. As film fans and critics alike struggled to comprehend the meaning behind this [...]
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    Posted: February 05, 2007, 9:00am EST
    by Susan

  • Academy Award Cupcake Extravaganza: Get Ready to Be Toast, Suckas

    Number of comments: 7
    The 79th Annual Academy Awards will be honored by the attentions of Ross and Valerie (authors of Haduken and Made in Richmond, respectively), Justin (of Awkward Things I Say to Girls fame), and myself. And when I say "attentions," I mean a kickass contest we've concocted that involves winners, losers, [...]
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    Posted: January 30, 2007, 9:22am EST
    by Susan

  • Children of Men: SOYLENT GREEN IS BABIES

    Number of comments: 5
    For the record, I really liked this film. Alfonso Cuaron has proved himself a talented director who can obviously craft an interesting portrayal of mankind’s possible future, a daunting feat, to say the least. Clive Owen, Michael Caine, and Claire-Hope Ashitey do exceptional representations of tired guy, hopeful guy, and [...]
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    Posted: January 30, 2007, 8:00am EST
    by Susan

  • Notes on a Scandal: "Denchett" Coined!

    Number of comments: 3
    (From my review at lostatsea.net) Richard Eyre, 2006 It’s so much harder to write something about a movie you loved than it is something you detested or, better yet, something you detested but everybody elsed raved over. I always worry about becoming repetitive: “Notes on a Scandal is great. The directing was [...]
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    Posted: January 22, 2007, 10:11am EST
    by Susan

  • Most Boringest - Golden Globes 2007

    Number of comments: 4
    Usually the Golden Globes do a pretty good job of picking up some of the Academy's slack and giving a little credit where it's due, but this year, the Academy's passion for People Playing Other People seems to have infected the Globes as well. As I predicted, anyone connected to The [...]
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    Posted: January 16, 2007, 10:20am EST
    by Susan

  • The Good German: Cloonz in Uniform

    (From my review at LostAtSea.net...) To me, Steven Soderbergh has always come across as the next Spielberg. Unfortunately for him, the current Spielberg is still making films, and they’re good films, too. So, I imagine, in an attempt to differentiate himself from the reigning king of mainstream cinema, Soderbergh makes little [...]
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    Posted: January 11, 2007, 11:01am EST
    by Susan

  • Night at the Museum: Most Expensive Public Service Announcement Ever

    Shawn Levy, 2006 (From my review at LostAtSea.net...) Ben Stiller plays Ben Stiller in this kid flick and/or two-hour-long advertisement for New York’s Museum of Natural History. I know I’m coming across as really harsh, but it just so happens that usually I like Ben Stiller, I like kids’ movies, and I’m [...]
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    Posted: January 03, 2007, 11:59am EST
    by Susan

  • Eragon: It's Been Seen at Least Once

    Stefen Fangmeier, 2006 I think it’s safe to say that our current moviegoing culture is tolerant if not celebratory regarding fantasy movies. Narnia was a big deal last year. Then there’s Harry Potter, and of course Lord of the Rings was the world’s first film project to rake in an [...]
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    Posted: December 21, 2006, 10:24am EST
    by Susan

  • This year Netflix gets a stocking crammed with rats

    Netflix sends you email notifications now when one of your friends has "sent you" a note. Most of my Netflix friends are savvy enough to use the annoying "note" feature as the old Two-Cent Review feature, and they simply send them to all of your friends (an option we had [...]
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    Posted: December 20, 2006, 4:19pm EST
    by Susan

  • The Queen: Incredible Insight, I'm Assuming

    Stephen Frears, 2006 I’ve said this time and time again, but this year I’m going to make some money off of it. In order to win an Academy Award for Best or Best Supporting Actor or Actress, you must be impersonating a real figure in a biopic about that figure. [...]
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    Posted: December 01, 2006, 9:54am EST
    by Susan

  • Casino Royale: Double-Ohhhh-Seven

    Martin Campbell, 2006 [Since I can only see so many movies, and since she needed an outlet for her feelings, this review was written by Kelly Gerow] I have never been interested in the Bond franchise. I’m aware of its existence and that pop culture is saturated by Bond references – “shaken, [...]
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    Posted: November 28, 2006, 9:05am EST
    by Susan

  • The Prestige Is The One About Magic Tricks, Not About Gang Life

    Christopher Nolan, 2006 It’s difficult to go wrong with a Christopher Nolan movie that stars Christian Bale, Hugh Jackman, and, most importantly, Michael Caine, especially when top hats and waistcoats are involved. I mean, you’re not going to win any Oscars (and, really, who can even guarantee that anymore), but you’re [...]
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    Posted: November 26, 2006, 10:42pm EST
    by Susan

  • Borat, Amnesia, Sawyer, Etc.

    Larry Charles, 2006 In an effort to catch up on my film-watching and director-berating, I spent much of this past weekend staring at various screens. Borat was the main event, but I also experienced that sense of productivity that only Netflix users with a giant queue can feel and watched [...]
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    Posted: November 14, 2006, 4:55pm EST
    by Susan

  • The Departed Has Made a Fool Out of Me

    Martin Scorsese, 2006 I have never been a fan of Leonardo DiCaprio, Matt Damon, or Martin Scorsese. I’m sorry. The first two annoy me, and Gangs of New York got me a speeding ticket (well, it was really long and I was tired when we got out of the theater, [...]
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    Posted: November 02, 2006, 2:56pm EST
    by Susan

  • Conveniently, The Science of Sleep Comes With Its Own Review Title

    Michel Gondry, 2005 The Science of Sleep is the following: 1. Clever 2. Beautiful 3. Funny 4. Innovative 5. Etc. Michel Gondry, dear Michel Gondry, is a great director, but can't hack it without a good writer like Charlie Kaufman helping him out. The entire movie feels like it lives inside one of the Gondriest parts of [...]
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    Posted: October 09, 2006, 3:40pm EDT
    by Susan

  • LEAVE WORK IMMEDIATELY AND GO SEE LITTLE MISS SUNSHINE (At Your Earliest Convenience)

    Jonathan Dayton and Valerie Faris, 2006 I feel stupid for giving any glowing reviews to any other movies this year because, in retrospect, they’re not worth the paper their tickets were printed on. “But surely…you still love The Squid and the Whale, right?” WRONG. And now I have to go back [...]
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    Posted: August 24, 2006, 2:58pm EDT
    by Susan

  • The Devil Wears Prada and Won't Get Out of My Head!

    David Frankel, 2006 For a predictable, fluffy movie based on a predictable, fluffy book*, The Devil Wears Prada sure inspired a lot of serious post-movie discussion. In attempting to portray the fascinating exploits of the Boss from Hell, Miranda Priestly (played by Meryl Streep), this film instead questions not just a [...]
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    Posted: July 26, 2006, 4:07pm EDT
    by Susan

  • All I Know for Sure is That There are Pirates of the Caribbean and a Dead Man's Chest

    Gore Verbinski, 2006 I typically try to stay away from movies that star Johnny Depp, and I certainly try to stay away from reviewing them. The reasons are simple. For the former, people seem to get uncomfortable sitting next to a person who repeatedly screams, “TOUCH ME, JOHNNY” at the screen. [...]
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    Posted: July 20, 2006, 3:12pm EDT
    by Susan

  • Why the World Needs Superman Returns

    Bryan Singer, 2006 Being more of a Batman/X-Men girl rather than a Superman/Spider-Man/whateverelsethereis girl, I never paid much attention to the guy in the red cape, assuming that muscle-bound true blue heroes with no apparent dark side were boring. Well, I'll be the first to admit that I was dead wrong. Granted, [...]
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    Posted: July 04, 2006, 4:52pm EDT
    by Susan
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